Yn Pabyr Seyr is published by Mec Vannin, the Manx Nationalist Party. All articles are copyright Mec Vannin unless otherwise stated. Mec Vannin grants permission to reproduce articles from Yn Pabyr Seyr provided that the source is credited.

Issue 15 - January 1995
Incorporating the Offshore Lancashire Times


Yet again, a Mec Vannin initiative has left Central Government floundering and confused. So much so, that both Miles Walker and Donald Gelling have resorted to making some pretty pathetic retorts.

The line from both men (they'd obviously discussed this one at length) was that it was strange that a nationalist party should be "looking toward Europe". The inference is clearly that Mr. Walker and Gelling do not perceive France, Germany etc. to be real nations.

What are we supposed to do? Pretend that there's just a big bright patch of ocean east of Dover? No.

Mec Vannin will leave that sort of thinking to the Yesterday Men of the current government. Europe's influence upon Mannin is and will continue to be substantial irrespective of our relationship with Europe at any time. It is, therefore, essential that Mannin, be it via Mec Vannin or the government, continue to negotiate and bargain for whatever deals and concessions can be obtained from Europe.

That means talking to Europe directly, not through some third party with little or no interest in our best interests. If Mannin becomes totally independent, and that is an increasing possibility, we must make some very important and properly informed decisions regarding our international associations.

Another line from the increasingly desperate Mr. Walker, in relation to European funding was, "We should stand on our own two feet, not rely on hand outs from larger neighbours."

Three days later it was revealed that Walker and Co. had to hand back £750,000 Euro-cash, granted to aid the abandoned IRIS wetlands project. It also sits awkwardly with the findings of the Council of Ministers' Report on low incomes which
recommended that, rather than standing on their own two feet with the right to work and earn a minimum wage, those on low income should be forced to rely on handouts from their wealthier neighbours.

Finally, Mec Vannin has been accused on more than one occasion of scare-mongering in relation to the future of the finance industry, Europe and Mannin. Illiam Costain's report contains the facts, first hand from European officials, that show that the dangers are very real and approaching rapidly.

The sorry old line that "Protocol Three is the best of both worlds" has been wheeled out once too often. Protocol Three means paying through the nose to comply with European standards for exportable goods, and getting no assistance whatsoever.

Mec Vannin's ongoing investigations with Europe may reveal that our future lies in trading elsewhere entirely, but we can't tell until we have talked to Brussels in the manner of an independent nation.


It's good to see Mec Vannin's "Think Manx" policy has finally been adopted by Manx business and commerce and endorsed by Government (of course, all Government's best policies come from Mec Vannin).

In these days of eroded national identity it would be too much to expect that we would have a "Think Manx" campaign; nowadays in the language of business and politics, Manx has been replaced by "local" just as the "Isle of Man" and "Mannin have been replaced by the "Island". However, the name of the policy is not the most important aspect so we'll just have to make do with "Think Local".

So what exactly does "think local" mean? To nationalists, it means that where ever a suitable Manx resource exists it should be used in preference to non-Manx alternatives (even if their face value is sometimes cheaper). "Think local" means that whenever important political or business decisions are made, the needs and wishes of the people of the Isle of Man should be place above all other considerations. In short "think local" means THINK MANX!

What "think local" does not mean, of course, is blind support for all retail outlets in the Isle of Man. It does not mean support for shops owned and often staffed by non-Manx residents, nor does it mean support for shops which either don't sell Manx goods where available or display Manx goods in a half-hearted or somewhat embarrassed way.

Government probably has the most to learn from the "think local" idea. "Think local" does not mean upgrading or rebuilding Government offices while many Government employed manual workers are on the poverty line; neither does "think local" mean stuffing the civil service with the best the UK can provide when Manx graduates and workers should be employed even if they did require some training! Likewise, "think local" does not mean adopting an educationally flawed curriculum from England when students are being denied Manx language classes and aren't even offered classes in general Manx studies.

"Think local" does mean putting the interests of the Isle of Man above the interests of greed crazed money launderers and tax dodgers. "Think local" also means putting Manx residents' views and wishes above the money craving instincts of the developer and the property speculator.

Finance Sector Policy Review Committee rejects Moffatt's Memorandum

Response to Bernard Moffatt's Memorandum of Dissent by the Finance Sector policy Review Committee:

The most serious attack on Mec Vannin's recently adopted Finance Sector policy Review Report has come not from the industry itself or the Manx press but, surprisingly, from Mec Vannin's own press officer, Bernard Moffatt.

Mr. Moffatt's views are contained in a memorandum of dissent which, without prior consultation, he released at the same time as the official Mec Vannin press release publicising the report.

Although the memorandum contains Mr. Moffatt's views alone and does not represent any body of opinion within Mec Vannin it nonetheless deserves proper consideration and reply if only for the way it so concisely expresses the "establishment" case for maintaining and expanding the finance industry in Mann.

The defence of the finance sector presented in the memorandum runs thus, and I paraphrase:

If we want a level of material culture and state services equal to or greater than that of the U.K., then we need to import high value, high growth industries. This is necessary not only because our small population makes us incapable of generating the wealth ourselves, but also because we have a higher dependency ratio than the U.K.

We also, so the argument goes on, need an industry which doesn't bring in its wake an unacceptable influx of immigrants which would threaten our "quality of life". According to the memorandum (and for that matter the government, the A.P.G., Labour Party. et al.) the offshore finance industry fits the bill to a tee.

Throughout the memorandum is an implicit assumption that the Manx people are incapable of creating an independent future for themselves except as servants of imported high growth industries. Leaving this aside for a moment, however, the justification of the finance sector as presented in the memorandum is still flawed even on its own terms. In contradiction of the findings of the Mec Vannin policy report, Mr. Moffatt writes:

"The finance sector makes an important contribution to the Manx G.N.P. However, its contribution is a statistical minority in terms of the economy and the sector is not homogeneous."

Mr. Moffatt makes uncritical use of the government statistic which shows that in 1991 the finance industry employed 13.7% of the workforce, whilst generating a disproportionate 34% of national income. From this he makes the erroneous claim that the offshore industry therefore creates wealth without stimulating significant immigration and damage to our quality of life.

In reality, around 22% of the working population and 46% of the economy is reliant on the finance industry. By artificially inflating our economy with the through-flow of fugitive international capital, the finance sector makes the Isle of Man an attractive market for economic colonisation and exploitation by the likes of U.K. and Irish building firms, large retailers and others as well as a host individual entrepreneurs.

If the pollution, traffic congestion in towns and villages, the destruction of countryside by speculative housing developments, the increasingly cut throat competition for work from incoming businesses and general substitution of Manx cultural norms by a finance sector work ethic and pace of life is not an erosion of our quality of life, then what is?

As to the argument in the memorandum that the finance sector is not a monolithic and inherently unstable industry, Mr. Moffatt misses the main point made in the official report:

What makes the finance sector an unreliable economic partner and benefactor from a Manx point of view, is that it is almost wholly owned by and run in the interests of far off trans-national corporations, with loyalty only to maximising profit and the ability to move at will to where it can most easily be made. This makes THEM, not the Manx government, the real power in the land.

Whilst the finance sector is made up of several elements, chiefly banking and insurance, it cannot be claimed that the sector is diversified in the sense that any of these elements are free-standing and insulated to any degree from each other's economic fortunes. In fact, they are about as diversified and heterogeneous as a row of dominoes; they stand or fall together depending on whether or not outside interests continue to have overall confidence in the stability / servility of the Isle of Man as an offshore finance centre.

Perhaps the most important issue raised by Mr. Moffatt comes in the conclusion to his memorandum:

"The challenge to our organisation, Mec Vannin, is not to block economic growth, but to ensure that it does not translate into a social and cultural nightmare for the Manx Nation."

For a nationalist, the narrowness of vision displayed here is astounding. In effect it seems that Mr. Moffatt is recommending that Mec Vannin should accept the political and economic agenda of the current ruling establishment and adopt a merely reactionary role in order to limit the social and cultural collateral damage inflicted on the Manx people. It is the view of the Finance Sector Review Committee, and indeed the membership of Mec Vannin who endorsed its report, that the nightmare of growthist economic development is already here and will worsen considerably unless a new set of guiding principles and values are adopted at the heart of government. As well as vociferously exposing the deficiencies of government policies, we believe that Mec Vannin should be actively campaigning to bring about such a shift in values towards ones which put the Manx people at the heart of any development here, rather than the periphery.

Chris Sheard, for and on behalf of the finance sector policy review committee.


"Mec Vannin proposes that our economic development should be based upon the principle of sustainable economic growth com-mensurate with our small size and natural population level."

Mec Vannin Policy Document April 1992.

The traditional economic vision for the future is that everyone, in a global human population growing at an alarming rate, should aspire to the high consumption, high pollution way of life of the rich minority. This vision is obviously and hopelessly false and so we need to define a new sort of economic progress, directed to the well being of people and the environment, to quality of life rather than quantity of consumption. The new "green economics" must enable people to develop their own sustainable ways of living, in the context of their own cultures.

In the Isle of Man, our politicians, our people and our entire system of government are locked into the idea of never ending growth and ever higher consumption, as indeed are traditional politicians everywhere.

Fortunately, our policy document of April 1992 already contains some of the ideas and alternatives that green economics puts forward and so we should expand these ideas and ultimately put forward an alternative to the stale ideas of "Prosperity Through Growth". Then we might be able to get across our idea that "growth" in the traditional economic sense has a negative downside and is by no means always a positive thing.

Paul Kelly.

Miles: Prospering and caring for Port St. Mary

Harping back to this "Think Local" thing, "local" to me means Port Saint Mary. I try to think local when I do my shopping but, unfortunately, this last 15 years or so has seen the decimation of Port Saint Mary as a place to shop. Due to business' "think big strategies" and Government's "think little and do even less" approach to preserving local communities, shopping in Port St. Mary has become very limited. There are even those that say that the life and spirit of the community has been lost.

Now imagine my astonishment when I read in the paper, a few weeks ago, Miles' comment over the opening of Scoill Purt le Moirrey. He reckoned that the new school would breath life back into Port St. Mary and that building the new school was the best thing that he'd ever done. I've no argument with his words, but hasn't he got some cheek when he has supposedly been representing Port St. Mary in the Keys throughout the period of its rapid decline?

P.A. Gawne, Cultural Officer.

So that was 1994 ......

We made an extensive oral and written submission to the Committee investigating freedom of information. We decided that we definitely don't like the finance industry (except for Bernard). We boycotted Tynwald Fair because of the unnecessary and
belittling presence of HRH, but turned up at the last minute to dish out Yn Pabyr Seyr and launch the Greenfield Fighting Fund. We upset Dandara by suggesting that the grotesque despoilation of our countryside was not dreams becoming reality. We handed out literature expressing our views to a group of Swiss lawyers and bankers and upset Mr. Gilbey. We finally got Archibald Cregeen commemorated (Thanks to Cathy Clucas, Reverend Clayton, Yn Cheshaght Ghailckagh, Cubbon's the stonemasons and all who helped attend. Illiam Costain went to Brussels and talked to Big People and we upset Mr. Gilbey again and did lots of other things....

Gyn Shennaghys, Gyn Ashoonys

Scruit as loayrit magh liorish Chris Sheard ec Cronk Hango, Laa Illiam Dhone, 1995.

Ta ny Manninee, myr pobble, gyn enney erbee er nyn shennaghys co-chadjin. Cha nee agh shennaghys persoonagh as mooinjeragh ta er mayrn as far-chredjue dy row yn shennaghys ain ooilley bentyn rish praaseyn, skeddan as boghtynid. Ny smoo na shoh, cha nel eh rieau er ve cho ymmyrchagh dooin yn shennaghys ain y hoiggal. Shen my varel as shen cooish yn oraid shoh.

Cre voish haink yn meehushtey shoh? Ta'n chooid smoo dy Vanninee er choayl yn shennaghys oc kyndagh rish yn drogh chorys-ynsee hooar shin veih ny Sostynee 'sy nuyoo cheead. Ayns ny scoillyn cadjin as er lheh 'sy schoill roin jiu, cha nel sheelogheyn dy Vanninee er n'ynsaghey veg, dy oikoil, mychione nyn gultoor as shennaghys hene.

Agh nagh vel shin lhome-lane dy hennaghys as eiraght 'sy traa t'ayn? Jeeagh shiu ayns shapp lioar erbee. As nagh vel yn reiltys ain jannoo e chooid share dy chur roish y theay skeeal yn ashoon ain? Son shickyrys, t'ad g'eearree troggal thieyn-tashtee dy liooar!

Yiarrin nagh. Yiarrin nagh vel ad freayll as soilshaghey magh agh yn ayrn marroo jeh'n chultoor ain; ny shenn ghreienyn as aghtyn baghee - yn vleayst follym, ta shen dy ghra. Gys y traa shoh, cha nel adsyn as pooar oc er chur monney tastey da'n chennaghys Manninagh. Cha nel skeeal yn ashoon ain voish cheu ny Manninee er ve clouit noadyr er dyn bleeantyn jeih as daeed. Agh nish, er-lhiams dy vel caghlaa scanshoil, as gaueagh neesht, fo raad.

Lhaih mee lioar-voayrd-caffee ghloasagh shiaghtin ny jees er dy henney enmyssit "Moods of Mann". Aynjee va scruit ec lhiams-lhiats Manninagh dy row shennaghys giare yn ellan ain myr b'vie lesh yn cherroo-argidys (ren g'eeck er-e-son) as yn reiltys soilshaghey magh eh.

Ta'n ughtar cur roin daa argane scanshoil. Hoshiaght, t'eh shirrey prowal nagh beagh agh aght-baghee as cultoor boght ec ny Manninee ghooie gyn bree as argid ny Juanyn Haink Noal. S'goan oddagh shin er jeet neose veih ny biljyn, t'eh screeu,
gyn yn chooney ocsyn!

'Sy nah ynnyd, t'eh resooney nagh lhisagh shinyn, ny Manninee ghooie, ve ro voirit as shinyn nyn myn-vunlught ayns y cheer ain pene ny laghyn shoh. Son ooilley, t'eh gra, nagh jig ny cummaltee noa dy ve cho Manninagh ayns sheeloghe ny jees as ny Manninee ayns ny shenn laghyn jeh sluight ny Loghlynee as ny Sostynee? Shoh sampleyr mie (ny sie) jeh'n chennaghys noa ta goll er screeu rere yn reiltys as cooie da'n cherroo argidys, chiarnyn noa y cheer ain.

Er my hon hene, ta mee credjal dy re boghtynid yn vershoon "oikoil" shoh. Ta mee credjal dy vel yn shennaghys ain ginsh dooin skeeal as lessoonyn elley dy bollagh anchasley rish.

Ayns ny laghyn chaie, cha row rieau slane verchys as saaseyn yn ellan shoh cc y theay Vanninagh. Va'n chooid share dy kinjagh goit ersooyl cc ny reiltee yoarree ain. Cha nee yn cultoor ain pene ren freayll ny Manninee ayns boghtynid agh ny drogh lughtyn-reill harrystoo feie yn chennaghys ain.

Lhisagh shin goaill moyrn, cha nee nearey jeh'n aght chum ny shenn Vanninee rish nyn gultoor gyn scansh da'n vee-reill shen. Lurg ooilley, cha nee reihys, myr ta paart gra, agh accrys as genney hug er ny Manninee nyn jengey as aght baghee y hreigeil 'sy nuyoo cheead. Cha duitt yn chenn chultoor Gaelgagh veih-my-cheilley derrey haink shin fo-reill jeeragh ny Goaldee 'sy vlein shiaght keead jeig, queig as three feed as hraast ad y phing yerrinagh ass y cheer.

S'feer gra dy jarroo dy vel shin ooilley dy bunneydagh jeh sluight "joarree" ennagh: Gaelgagh, Loghlynnagh, Sostynagh as fir elley haink stiagh 'syn ellan thousane, ny keead, ny lieh cheead bleeaney er dy henney. Agh cha nel whilleen dy chummaltee noa rieau er jeet stiagh ayns traa cho giare as shoh, as cha nel yn enney Manninagh as cultoor ain rieau er ve cho faase as nish noadyr. S'breagagh dy ghra, er y fa shen, dy vel yn chooid smoo jeu cur bree noa da'n chultoor ain ny laghyn shoh. S'feer dy ghra dy vel polaseeyn noi-Vanninagh y reiltys ta tayrn stiagh whilleen dy yoarreeyn, marroo yn cultoor ain as dy vel ad cur er bun ayns ynnyd jeh fer smessey, neu-Vanninagh.

Spooill ny Goaldee yn cultoor dooghyssagh ain sy nuyoo cheead agh ren ad jeeill foddey ny smessey na shen dooin. Hug ad dooin yn corys-ynsee Sostynagh as chaill shin son y chooid smoo, nyn shennaghys as enney ashoonagh cadjin kyndagh rish.

Shen y fa, ta mee credjal, nagh vel eh er jeet lesh yn ghleayshaght ashooneyragh ec traa ny reihyssyn cadjin. Ta ny far-ashooneyryn 'sy reiltys gra dy vel daa raad ynrican da ny Manninee; yn raad ocsyn ny yn raad er-ash da laghyn praaseyn as skeddan. Kyndagh rish keead blein dy vee ynsaghys ta ymmodee Manninee credjal yn reih shoh as t'ad jiooldey yn cultoor ocsyn.

Dy firrinagh, ta'n shennaghys ain g'ynsaghey dooin dy re breagagh yn reih shoh. T'eh g'ynsaghey dooin, dy firrinagh, dy beagh aght-baghee souyr dy liooar da ny Manninee ayns Mannin dy beagh slane seyrsnys politickagh ain as slane niart ain er saaseyn as berchys ooilley nyn jeer hene.

Cha jeanmayd scapail veih'n scadoo ta ny bleeantyn shiaght keead jeig queig as three feed, as hoght keead jeig daa-yeig as three feed foast ceau orrin derrey vees firrinys y hennaghys ain currit roish y theay.

S'liklee nagh bee yn curriglym Sostynagh ayns ny scoillyn ceaut ersooyl dy gerrid. Er y fa shen, t'eh orrin pene, ny ashooneyryn, soilshaghey magh yn shennaghys Manninagh firrinagh ayns aght erbee oddysmayd cooie da'n phobble; er lheh, er lhiams, ayns arraneyn as cloieyn myr ren ny Gaelgeyryn ayns Nalbin dy speeideilagh kuse dy vleeantyn er dy henney.

Chaill shin nyn gredjue ayndooin pene myr pobble er lheh 'sy lhing choloinagh Ghoaldagh as cha nirreemayds reesht myr ashoon Manninagh derrey vees yn credjue shen currit er bun reesht.

Without History, Without Nationhood

A translation of the Manx speech by Chris Sheard, Delivered at Hango Hill on the 2nd January, 1995.

The Manx, as a people, have no knowledge of their collective -history. Only individual and family history remains as well as the misbelief that our history is all "spuds 'n' herrin'" and poverty. What's more, it has never been so important that we understand our history. That's my view and that is the subject of this speech.

Where did this ignorance come from? Most people have lost their Manx history because of the pernicious education system given to us by the English in the 19th century. In the ordinary schools, and especially in the school before us today (King William's College), generations of Manx people have learnt nothing officially of their own native culture and history.

But aren't we overflowing with history and heritage these days? Look in any book-shop. And isn't our government doing its best to present to the people, the story of our nation? They certainly want to build enough museums!

I would say not. I would say that they only preserve the dead part of our culture; the old implements and ways of life - the empty husk, that is. Up till now, those in power haven't paid much attention to Manx history. Neither has a Manx history, from a Manx point of view, been published since the '50s. But now, I believe, an important and dangerous change is underway.

I read a glossy, coffee-table book a couple of weeks ago entitled "Moods of Mann". In it was written a short history of our island as the finance sector (who paid for it) and the government would like it to be seen.

The author presents us with two arguments: Firstly, he tries to prove that without the vigour and money of the come-overs, now and in former times, the native Manx would only have a poor culture and way of life.

Without their help, he writes, we'd still be in the trees.

Secondly he argues that we, the native Manx, shouldn't be too bothered that we are now an ethnic minority in our own country. After all, he says, won't the new residents become as Manx, in a generation or two, as the Manx people in former times of Viking and English origin?

This is a good example of the new history according to the government and agreeable to the finance sector, the new lords of our land.

Myself, I think this "official" version is rubbish. I believe that our history tells us another story and other lessons, completely contrary to those that are being written now.

In the past, the ordinary Manx people never had the benefit of all the wealth and resources of this island. The best part was always creamed off by our foreign rulers. It wasn't our own culture which kept the Manx in poverty, but the bad rulers over them throughout our history.

We ought to be proud, not ashamed, of the way the old Manx people held on to their culture in spite of this mis-rule. After all it wasn't choice, as some say, but the hunger and want inflicted upon the Manx that forced them to abandon their language and way of life in the 19th century. The old Gaelic culture didn't fall apart until we came under the direct rule of the British in the year 1765, and they squeezed the land dry.

It's true indeed that we are all originally of "foreign" descent; Gaelic, Viking, English and others, who came to the island a thousand, a hundred, or fifty years ago. But never have so many new residents come in such a short space of time as now, and never have our Manx identity and culture been so weak as they are now either.

It's false to claim, therefore, that the majority of them are reinvigorating our culture these days. It's true to say that the anti-Manx policies of the government, which draw so many foreigners, are killing our culture with one worse, and un-Manx.

The British wrecked our native culture in the 19th century, but they did far worse harm to us than this. They gave us the English education system and we lost, for the most part, our history and collective national identity because of it.

That is why, I believe, the nationalists have not been as successful at election time as they should have been. The "nationalists" (in name only) in the government say that there are only two roads for the Manx: Their road or the road back to "spuds 'n' herrin'". Because of 100 years of miseducation, many Manx give credence to the former choice and they reject their culture.

In truth, our history teaches us that this choice is a false one. It teaches us, really, that the Manx people could live comfortably in Mann if we had full political freedom and control of all the resources and wealth of our own country.

We won't escape from the shadow that the years 1765 and 1872 still cast over us until the truth of our history is made known to the people.

It is likely that the English National Curriculum will be with us for some while yet. Therefore, it's up to us, the nationalists, to set forth the real Manx history in any accessible way we can - especially, I think, through songs and plays as the Gaelic speakers in Scotland did a few years ago.

We lost belief in ourselves as a separate people under British colonial rule and we won't rise again as a Manx nation until that belief is re-established.

English Oration - Illiam Dhone Day 1995

By Paul Kelly

In less than two years time the Isle of Man will be facing another General Election and although hope springs eternal, I know and you know that we are almost certainly bound to be disappointed if we are expecting some sort of democratic revolution in which the entire old Guard are swept out of office and replaced, out of the blue, by men and women committed to rescuing the Manx people from a bleak future as a marginalised minority in some offshore, second division banking and insurance bolt hole.

I am sure I am not alone here today in dreaming of a result where every candidate who ever refers to the Isle of Man as being, "like a limited company in which we are the shareholders" gets their true come-uppance and any M.H.K. who ever considers that past experience in running their own business is good qualification for being in Government is slung out of office and replaced by people with political ideals who might perhaps set their sights a little higher and reach out to the hearts and minds of the Manx nation.

I do not suppose that I am alone either in yearning for a result which sees the back of all those who think that "progress" lies in allowing huge housing developments to sprawl across our green fields, or in an ever-increasing number of cars on the roads, or in constructing a hospital inside the TT course and a fly-over across a valley to reach it, or for that matter, in demolishing graceful buildings to replace them with office blocks. No, I am certain I am not alone in wishing to see them voted out, along with all those whose obsession it is to turn beauty into power.

However, it is clear that wishing and hoping or dreaming will not be enough. The reality is there will be NO change until the right people are in the House or, at the very least, some of the right people are and I am sure that it is the role of Mec Vannin to try to achieve that.

I believe Manx people increasingly see M.H.K.'s as having lost touch with the electorate. This is particularly so in the case of Ministers, who take decisions behind closed doors on matters which never appeared in their own original manifestos. Many of us in Mec Vannin feel that the Ministerial system of government that is now in place and especially the power of political patronage in the hands of the Chief Minister has been a disaster for the Manx people.

The situation at present is that the great majority of our M.H.K.s stand and are elected as Independents. They then elect a Chief Minister (over which the electorate has no say) who in turn selects his or her Council of Ministers. Then, and this is the clever part, this Council of Ministers issues a Manifesto in the shape of the Government Policy Document! Ask yourself, "what kind of Government issues a manifesto after being elected? What kind of M.H.K. stands as an independent and then compromises that independence by becoming a Minister?"

Strangely, you may think, they are then entitled to be addressed as "honourable" members!

You may say that is democracy, we voted them in and we should let them get on with it, well, yes, the House of Keys is democratically elected but we should not pretend that it is representative of the Manx electorate. How can it possibly be when, for example, only one member out of 24 is a woman? Only one member out of 24 is under 40 years old? BUT more than twelve members out of 24 have business interests.

So then, how can Mec Vannin change any of this? Ultimately only by putting up candidates at local and national level and getting them elected. I realise this means overcoming obstacles, not least of which is our own antipathy to traditional politics, but I also know there is a considerable number of young Mec Vannin activists who have the heart felt commitment, integrity and ability to make a radical change to the House of Keys, and therefore to Government, if elected. Whilst it is for the membership to decide the contents of a future Mec Vannin election manifesto our existing Policy Document contains a number of principles which I know will not be compromised. Our manifesto should make no concessions on the priority we give to the environment for example. Nor should we be tempted to adapt our policy of ending allegiance to the British Crown to what some might consider a less controversial stance. A Bill of Rights Act and a Freedom of Information Act are also both essential. Our manifesto must also address the problem of how we restrict rapid population growth from outside, without the racist overtones of immigration control.

I am convinced that it is now essential that we commit ourselves bath to fielding candidates in future elections and to preparing a manifesto that sets out clearly and honestly what Mec Vannin stands for. If we set ourselves even the modest target of, say, six candidates standing, then I think we will see, at the very least, a shift in the debate in our direction and we could even be in the position of setting the agenda for the 1996 General Election.

The Offshore Lancashire Times

No 938467812 Average weekly circulation in excess of 250,000
Price 10 IOM ECU              14 November 2094

I.O.M. Plc in merger talks with Channel Islands Plc?

A source within Government has revealed that top level talks have taken place between the Board of Directors of the Channel Island Government and the Island's Council of Directors.

The traditional commercial links between the Channel Islands and the Island could now take a formal footing, if the story is true. Many Island residents regard the Channel Islands as the "Old Home Country" and have brought many of their customs and traditions with them, such as tax evasion and driving at 25 mph.

Questioned about a possible loss of independence or identity, Chief Minister Richard Dork said, "I regard this as a positive development. Residents of IOM Plc would become beneficial shareholders in Channel Islands Plc. A reciprocal agreement would have to be thrashed out, of

Continued on Page 9 (There was only one page)

Last Native Manxman's Statue to Memory of Manx People

Chief Minister Richard Dork unveiled the statue of the last true Manxman on Tuesday of this week. Manxman Juan Kermeen, lately of Peel, died aged 101 earlier this year. His statue will join those of fellow Manx men, Norman Wisdom, Nigel Mansell, George Formby, President Dan Quayle and Albert Gubay in the Villa Marina Garden of Statues. After the unveiling, Mr. Dork said, "There has been a small but vociferous minority who have claimed that this is a sad occasion. I prefer to think that there is a positive aspect to this. Of course we should remember our heritage in simple, cost effective fashion such as this, but we must not allow any sentimentality to get in the way of economic growth.

"The passing of Mr. Kermeen has removed an impediment under international law that made us pay undue regard to native peoples. The way is now clear to progress the full development of the Independent Offshore State of Man without the negative attitude of the Manx Crabs."

Inside this week's super O.L.T.


Albert Gubay Memorial Hospital


A "snip" at HALF the price!
Try our new super-quick vasectomy at a massive 50% reduction on normal prices (vouchers also accepted).

ALSO --CAN'T BELIEVE YOUR EARS? Sticky-out ears pinned back at 20% reduction.

Two For The Price of One.

The Isle of Man's main hospital at Ballamona is offering two operations for the price of one this month. The hospital which was built with money from the Isle of Man pension fun is offering all voucher holders the option, of two minor operations, such as ingrowing toenails, piles, "the snip", etc. The hospital used all of the pension fund by the time it was completed in the year 2000, but the D.H.S.S. kindly offered pension fund contributors valuable and useful vouchers instead which could be redeemed in exchange for various medical services / procedures at any of the Island's hospitals.

Small Fry

The last known surviving breeding pair of herring (Juan and Mona) have produced an offspring.

The fish, christened Gorry by excited herring keepers, is being tended round the clock to give it every chance of survival.
Meanwhile, D.A.F.T. Minister Joe Corrin has vehemently denied a rumour that it is planned to sell Gorry to a travelling aquarium.

Our investigative reporter Paul Grammar has discovered, however, that Gorry will instead go to the Scientific Fish and Chip Shops fast food chain in Belfast. Under the Privatisation of Government Departments Act 2004, an Act resulting from the "Prosperity Through Groves' report of 1999, Government departments are compelled to sell assets to the highest bidder.

Coastal Erosion Threatens T.T. Course

Kirk Michael is falling into the sea, threatening to take the T.T. course and several Dandara estates with it.

Chief Minister Richard Dork is undisturbed by the revelation, however. Questioned at Friday morning's press conference, he stated, "I actually regard this as quite a positive development. The need for replacement housing stock will provide a much needed boost to our building industry and I've heard that there's some undeveloped land above the smog line at the Veranda. Also, we plan to implement "Time for Change" which was shelved a hundred years ago. Kirk Michael Commissioners were very much opposed and their disappearance will ease things greatly."

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